Verbal Artistry; Good Gossip vs. Bad Gossip and Why it Matters

People love a good story, there’s no denying that; and corporate America is not immune.   We’re just people that like to be entertained, and we love good entertainers.  It’s discerning to keep in mind that there’s some story telling that can breathe life into your brand/property image and even you as a person, and some story telling that’s better avoided at all costs.  Awareness of what we’re prone to as humans is not a bad thing, and isn’t it true that if there’s some savory morsels of juicy drama spilling from mouth to ear, it goes down so easy doesn’t it?  If our words are paint and our mouths are paintbrushes, and we really want to be Van Gough’s in the art of speech, it’s wise to think before we open our mouths instead of recklessly slinging our words without consideration since the truth is that we’re painting impressions. 

Consider this, it’s the end of an event or program and you’re recovering from the crazy last few weeks of activation, intense communications, and you’re reflecting on your experience with your partners.  Maybe there was a partner that disappointed you; either they didn’t deliver at the level you expected, or their team was unorganized, maybe they were generally just hard to reach until D-day, or maybe for some reason you will not be renewing their partnership because of faults on their part.  After going home and screaming into your pillow, there’s a very short list of decision makers that you should straightforwardly and graciously communicate this issue with for the purpose of determining a solution to the problem.  Your anger or frustration should not trickle down into the ranks of volunteers or other sponsors, even though it’s tempting because we all need to let out a little steam here and there right?  And letting off steam can be a good thing, when done with the proper boundaries.  Here’s the problem with opening your mouth too fast to the wrong person:

1. Never burn bridges.  None of us knows what the future holds, and so you never know what person you might offend and in what way they might have the power to impact your brand or you personally.  So you’re better off being discrete with your opinions or frustrations.
2. When you talk badly about partners it’s an indication of how you might treat a new partner – without integrity and decency.  You might end up offending or frightening away a new partner as a result of careless or indiscrete words.  We all feel a little more secure with our reputations when we’re around people who consider us when we speak.
3. It’s unprofessional, and the parallel carries over to others’ impression of you as well as your brand.   A previous job I held put me in close contact with a team member who literally could not go one day without angrily complaining about company initiatives, customers, and colleagues.  To the above point, I honestly wondered what the heck she had to say about me, but it also gave me a sour taste in my mouth every time she tried to engage me in a conversation or discuss implementation.  She was actually very good at her job, quite efficient and goal oriented, but If given the opportunity, I would NEVER hire her for the reason that she was not careful with her words, and it impacted her environment; which leads me to my next point.
4. It takes major points away from motivating/insipring a team.  As a leader/decision maker, part of your job is to light a fire under the feet of your team so jobs are done with energy and passion.  When you have unproductive conversation about a partner, it takes away the motivation to activate with excellence, and makes a team feel less confident in partnership decision making.  Notice I said “unproductive” conversations – there is a such thing as productive conversations with your team where you can highlight opportunities and even point out issues in a partner, but it should not be done to blow off steam.  These conversations should have a point, and be solution oriented. 
5. It’s just plan mean.  Why would you want to hurt unnecessarily, or cause pain and trouble for a company or individual when given the choice?  If a brand or organization you previously partnered with has trouble gaining new partnerships, it shouldn’t be because you stabbed them in the back.

Now, on the flip side, the opposite is true of good gossip.  You maintain bridges and helpful connections, people trust you and want to work with you, you paint a professional self and brand image, and you keep your team inspired.  People are refreshed when they spend time with a person that offers good gossip, and sometimes it’s as easy as taking a brief moment to just say what you experienced.  Consider a time when something someone said about you came back to your attention.  If it was good, how did it make you feel?  Was it encouraging and inspiring?  Did it make you trust and even respect them more?  Did you feel understood and appreciated?  When we’re mad, we’re so quick to feel an urge to tell someone, but when something good happens we need to react just as quickly. I recently had a sponsor approach us with interest in one of the properties listed on SponsorPark; this property also happens to be one of the greatest pleasures to work with.  So I shot off a quick email to let the sponsor know how much we enjoyed working with her, and she responded back with a “very good to know, thanks

 I heard in a leadership conference once that really good leaders share credit – have you shared credit or pointed directly to a person, team or brand’s efforts lately?